"No ill befalls the righteous"

WHAT?!?!?!?! Yeah that's what I thought the first time I read that too. But that's what it said. Right there in my Bible. Yours too- Proverbs 12:21. Look it up- that's really what it says.
When I first read it I was tempted to gloss right over it. You know those verses that you read that don't make any sense, and your first (or at least my first) thought is just to keep right on reading and ignore it because its hard. But God had just been reminding me via a sermon not to be lazy about reading His word. So clearly I needed to stop and think about it. And the thinking about it went something like this:

Bother. "No ill befalls the righteous." ???? That can't be right.   What about all those passages about "all who would live godly in Christ Jesus will be persecuted", and loads of others.  Hasn't this guy ever read the New Testament? Oh wait- God wrote them both. But they look so opposite! But God never changes. So the standard for righteous never changes, so that's not the difference- either way we need God to make us righteous. But bad things DO happen to God's people so...... what is going on with this verse?
And then God brought to mind a different passage, from Romans 8 "God works all things together for the good of those that love Him" and  then to "for I consider that our present sufferings are not worth being compared to the glory that is prepared for us" and then to " for our light and momentary afflictions are working in us an eternal weight of glory...."
So hard things, hurtful things, things we hate, DO happen to us. But here's the difference: they're not bad. You see, the last half of Proverbs 12:21is about how bad things happen to the wicked.  And for the wicked- that's all they are. Bad. But for the righteous- they're not just bad. They're difficulties that are worth getting through because the good that comes from it is so, so great that the hard thing will seem more than worth it. It's not just bad- it's hard, but it's worth it.

And you know what? I really needed to remember that this week. You see.... today is the day I had hoped to be finished Partnership Development and return to the  Missionary Training Center. And God said no. And that is very, very hard. But after several weeks of moping and more days than I care to admit spent moping on the couch trying to think about something, anything else- God has finally got my attention. And He is reminding me that though it is hard- it's not worth comparing to the good He's got planned to come through this.

A Chance to Help

As you know from my last couple of entries- I do not have enough monthly support to return to the Missionary Training Center this fall. As you also know, there are two ministries that are going to be short handed as a result. I can't really do anything to help childcare, but as it became evident that I was  not going to be able to return for the fall semester, I was particularly burdened about the Hold the Ropes prayer ministry. You see, Rosemarie, the lady in charge, also helps teach classes at the beginning of each semester- such a heavy load that it is vital to have one previously trained staff member be there to train the new staff member. So me not being able to return leaves Rosemarie with the unfortunate dilemma of trying to train the new staff when she already is working 10 hour days.  SO - a few weeks ago I was praying about what I could do to help- and this crazy, insane little idea started to hatch....what if I could get back out to Missouri- just for a few days, to train the new staff? Obviously I can't stay (can't exactly live long term on 14% of your monthly expenses) so it wouldn't be as good as having someone full time in the office- but at least I could help them get going. Also, since it appears that I will not be back in Missouri for quite a while, it would be super handy if I could pack up my house more thoroughly, get a few things for the winter, and at least say 'hi' to my kiddos and their parents. Well I started to pray about it- thinking , of course that it would not work because- where was I going to come up with an extra $700? But I really, really wanted to help! It took some time, but with some encouragement, I decided to run the idea past Rosemarie. And it's a go. So- yay! I do get to go back in August (oh the irony)- but only for a week. Dates are, of course, still rather fluid, but the plan is to be on the road/at the Training Center for the first week of classes (Augst 17th ish to August 27th ish). Yay! It's not as good as being able to be back long term... but I am SO glad to be able to meet this critical part of the need at least. 

So please pray:

-that I would focus and use my time well up until this trip

- I'm in the process of replacing my poor little car. Please pray that would all go through before the road trip- this would save me loads of money on oil, and my parents a lot of worry about my car leaving me stranded on the side of the road. 

-For the rest of the money to come in for the trip. God's already provided about half of it- hurray! 

-for more monthly partners so that I can go back for real ASAP. 

-Praise that I get to do something to help! Pray that I would be a blessing while I'm there  (and here) and point people to Jesus. 

Turn in the Road

I hate detours- don't you? There's a particularly annoying one around the corner from my sister's place where I'm living right now. And I would have used a picture of that instead except my camera is broken- So you get a pretty relaxing picture instead.

So... this is the official turn. The corner: There is not enough regular monthly support promised  to go back to the training center, and the prayer ministry and my kiddos in August. While it's not a shock... it still really sucks. Pray for me if you would. It's harder than I thought to have tell people that over and over. I nearly cried on more than one person at church yesterday. Bah humbug. 

BUT:

God is giving me hope, and peace, and letting me see bits and pieces of what He's got planned for the fall. He's given me a part time job for the fall that's perfect hours to continue doing Partnership Development, and some neat ministry opportunities for while I'm here. 

New Date: January 4th ish? 

Of course- if God brings in the rest of the monthly support I need before that, I will oh so happily go back sooner :)

If you're interested in becoming a financial partner to help me get back sooner- click on the GIVE tab above- it will take you to the NTM website where you can find all the information you need. Or if you can click on the CONTACT tab- and send me a message, and I will be oh so happy to answer any questions I can. 

Thanks for praying guys! It means so, so much!

What you could please pray for me right now:

So teach us to number our days
    that we may get a heart of wisdom.
Return, O Lord! How long?
    Have pity on your servants!
Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love,
    that we may rejoice and be glad all our days.
Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us,
    and for as many years as we have seen evil.
Let your work be shown to your servants,
    and your glorious power to their children.
Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us,
    and establish the work of our hands upon us;
    yes, establish the work of our hands!

Psalm 90:12-17

I need at least another 63% of my financial support to go back to the training center. Needless to say this is not likely to happen in the next two weeks. But pray....

• that I would get a heart of wisdom, and know how to spend each day
• that I would be satisfied with God's steadfast love- that I would remember that God is doing something better than I can imagine through (what looks like it's going to be) a very long delay. And for encouragement. I'm not going to lie, this is really hard guys. I really, really wanted to be back in August. 
• that many people would see God's power through this journey of partnership development, and learn to love him more through it (let your work be shown to your servants)
• that God would set up the people He's got to partner with me financially to make this ministry a reality. (establish the work of my hands)

"My soul continually remembers it and is bowed down within me.

But this I call to mind, and therefore I have hope:

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; His mercies never come to an end;

They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness.

"The Lord is my portion," says my soul, "therefore I will hope in Him."

The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him.
 It is good that one should wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD.

- Lamentations 3: 20-27

Waiting, and being reminded that God will save me. 

Status Report:

As those of you have been reading for a while know- my car is not safe to go on the highway anymore. I'm still driving it on roadtrips because- well, I still have to get there, and I figure if it dies, it dies and and God will give me a new one. Actually, I am praying that God would provide a new, reliable car that would last a long time BEFORE Bilbo actually leaves me stranded on the side of the road somewhere. And preferably before the end of the month when I have to pay inspection. And then inspection on the new one. And then inspection again once I move to Missouri. So far, almost everyone who's been interested in helping has been interested in one time gifts: so this is what God's provided towards a new car. A friend of the family found a good car I could buy for $6000. I don't know if that's the exact car God's got in mind but  I checked around on some of those "help a missionary find a car" websites and they're about the  same price. So for now, I feel like that's probably a good ball park number to shoot for. Sorry I didn't have time to design a fun little graphic for this one :)

Promised Monthly Support: 12%

Trip to Pittsburg

Thank you all for praying for my trip to Pittsburgh- it was super encouraging! I got to stay with some friends of the family- that was a major blessing get to chat with and catch up with them! Yay! Sharing went well. I didn't puke or pass out and nobody threw tomatoes, so that qualifies as a success. :)
But I think the most encouraging  thing about the trip was that so man people seemed to catch the vision of why childcare and hold the ropes are important ministries! I can't tell you what a huge encouragement that was to me after a month of polite variations on "We're not interested" and "That's cute, when are you going to be a real missionary?". So to have so many people ask about my blog and take prayer cards and say they'll be praying for me was a an incredible incredible blessing that I am very thankful for!